I’ve found myself more stressed trying to change the situation than allowing the situation to change me.
Each passing day, I find myself stuck in the same place. I’m constantly trying to find ways to manipulate the things going on around me so that it fits into my fantasy world. I’ve lost days, weeks, months and even YEARS trying to understand MY SITUATION. Until one day it dawned on me: it’s not for me to UNDERSTAND. God has trusted me to sit in my pain long enough to have reached this place. My place of PURPOSE.
You see, I get pure pleasure in helping others at any and everything. People are constantly asking for my advice, knowledge or words of wisdom. I light up on the inside when a text comes through saying, “I need your help with something” or “Do you know where I can find…”.
THAT gives me pure joy.
NOW, I understand the situations I’ve tried to change for so long were preparing me, molding me and equipping me to handle the more difficult questions…questions like “Are all of those kids yours?” “Did your husband cheat on you?” “What made you have another baby after 11 years?” Then, there’s times I don’t receive questions, I receive compliments… “You’re so strong.” “I wish I were like you.” “God is truly going to bless you.”
I’ve become overwhelmed, yet overjoyed in this place. See, I wasn’t prepared for any of the difficult questions. Honestly, I was trying to figure them all out myself. I had been holding my breath trying to change my situation instead of using it to change me, prepare me…prepare me for my PURPOSE…to help people like you. I hadn’t realized that my pain was REALLY making me the strong woman many believed I was then. I took my pain and turned it into my purpose. I can breathe now!! My prayer is that you too can look at your situation, pray, ask God what is YOUR PURPOSE, allow HIM to use you so that you too can…JUST BREATHE!